Steamin' Pile of Memes


Polit­i­cal­ly it’s been an ugly week, so let’s do some cute baby ani­mals. And we’ll even make it edu­ca­tion­al and list the offi­cial term for each baby along with the offi­cial name for a group!

Koala loves belly scratches:

A baby koala is called a joey. Don’t think this is a baby, though.

There is no col­lec­tive noun for koalas; they don’t gath­er into groups. So you’re free to make up a name of your own. I’m gonna go with a stench of koalas, giv­en how they smell so bad.

Ikea monkey:

There is no such species of mon­key: Ikea Mon­key was a Japan­ese Snow Macaque named Dar­win, who was dis­cov­ered wan­der­ing around in an Ikea store in Ontario in 2012. Wear­ing a fur coat, no less. A baby Snow Macaque is called an infant. Kind of bor­ing. I’m not sure why this is set to Dust in the Wind: no word on whether they’re Kansas fans.  A group of Macaques is called a mis­sion, tribe, troop or cart­load.

This is how baby otters roll:

This lit­tle fel­la got high-cen­tered lying on his back and could­n’t get up. So he rolled–off the dock and into the water. Don’t wor­ry; Mama was there to catch him. He sounds like a hun­gry human baby, no less.

Baby otters are called pups or kit­tens.

Baby giraffes run and play:

Baby giraffes are best viewed from a safe dis­tance: If you get too close to her baby, a Mama giraffe does­n’t go Mama Bear; she goes Mama Giraffe. Don’t laugh; it’s not a joke: A giraffe can kill a full-grown lion with a sin­gle kick.

A baby giraffe is called a calf.

Bears in our pool:

Bears do indeed poop in the woods. I sus­pect they’ll do it in your pool as well. My advice: Let ’em swim and poop all they like. Clean up after they leave.

Baby bears are called cubs. You already knew that, so no points.

Cyclist meets family of skunks:

Kudos to the cyclist: He was smart enough hold still while Mama skunk and her kits sniff around his front tire and left shoe, then wad­dle away. The kits get my vote for the most adorable baby ani­mal sounds in this week’s entire Steamin’ Pile of Memes.


Baby duckling falls asleep under flower hat in mint garden:

I’ve heard cov­er­ing a bird cage with a sheet will put the bird to sleep. Appar­ent­ly ducks go to sleep if you put flow­ers on their heads.

A baby duck is called a duck­ling, so although I avoid being a gram­mar Nazi, I do feel com­pelled to point out that a “baby duck­ling” is a baby baby duck.

How a sloth gets a bath:

What do you call an ani­mal that’s adorable and creepy at the same time? I bet there’s a Ger­man word for it.

A baby sloth is a cub. Bor­ing! A group of sloths is called a snug­gle. D’aaaw!


Baby elephant throwing a tantrum:

Not sure why they call this a tantrum–the baby ele­phan­t’s sway­ing around to The Banana Boat Song like he’s audi­tion­ing for Beetle­juice. Baby ele­phants are called calfs.

Baby panda’s cute voice:

Pan­da babies are called cubs. You already knew that, of course, but I post­ed this so you could hear what pan­da cubs sound like.

Babies and puppies sleeping together:

Baby dogs are pup­pies. You knew that too, but enjoy this any­way.

Taron­ga’s lat­est arrival!

Taron­ga Zoo had­n’t named this new hip­po calf when this video was made; maybe they’ll have a nam­ing con­test. If so, I hope they don’t name her Cal­fy McCalf­face.

Lions cubs play; Mom eats

So cute! It reminds me of my own child­hood, when my sis­ters and I would play and Mom kept an eye on us while gnaw­ing on raw meat.

Sea lion pup nurses, naps, nurses

Anoth­er pup, anoth­er price­less oppor­tu­ni­ty to come up with an inter­est­ing name wast­ed.

Baby animals video compilation:

Baby bun­nies and beavers are called kits; baby birds are chicks or hatch­lings; baby hedge­hogs are called hoglets; baby chip­munks, guinea pigs, and ger­bils are pups; baby dinosaurs are called–wait, baby dinosaurs? Looks like some­one put a clip from one of the Juras­sic Parks movies in here!

Baby deer are calves; rac­coons are kits; baby pigs are piglets; baby snakes are snakelets; baby owls are owlets; a baby fish is a fry.

It’s offi­cial: hoglets is the coolest baby name!


Daily Dumbass Award

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