Daily Duh

“Vegans Are Smug, Joyless Martyrs And They Want You to Suffer, Too”

So here’s the thing: Peo­ple don’t care if some­one’s a Veg­an. Unless they’re invit­ing some­one over to eat din­ner, they don’t care if their guests are Veg­ans, or if they eat kosher, or if they’re lac­tose-intol­er­ant.

This, as we all know, does not stop Veg­ans from telling every­one they’re Veg­ans.

Prob­a­bly not all Veg­ans; no doubt many Veg­ans don’t see any need to announce it, just as the rest of us don’t see any need to announce that we’re not Veg­an.

But there are more than enough pushy, sanc­ti­mo­nious Veg­an ass­holes to give them all a bad name.

There’s only one thing that can make this worse: Left­ists. An awful lot of left­ists are pushy, sanc­ti­mo­nious ass­holes, who are also so nar­cis­sis­tic and con­ceit­ed they think the rest of the world waits with bat­ed breath for every jew­el of wis­dom that falls from their lips.

And that’s why the “Injured by a Veg­an?” ad cam­paign tak­ing place in Los Ange­les is so hilar­i­ous. Accom­pa­nied by their web­site, HateVegans.com, the ads spoof injury attor­ney ads. A quick perusal of the web­site reveals it’s actu­al­ly pro-Veg­an info from Eat Dif­fer­ent­ly, pro­duced by folks self-aware enough to know Veg­ans gen­er­ate a lot of ire, and smart enough to poke fun at them­selves, tongue in cheek, while they share info about Veg­an­ism.

That’s admirable and fun­ny, but not down­right hilar­i­ous. Here’s why it’s hilar­i­ous:

The arti­cle feels the need to reas­sure its read­ers that no, “the ad is not actu­al­ly an earnest call for aggriev­ed meat-eaters to stage some sort of class-action law­suit against the gen­er­al idea of veg­an­ism.”

That’s right: Don’t wor­ry, left­ist Veg­ans; this is all a joke. No one real­ly wants to harm you over your diet. This isn’t about you at all. Thumbs up for being con­vinced you’re the cen­ter of the uni­verse.

Let's hear it for Vegans: today's Daily Dumbass award winner! Daily Duh Award

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