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Pelosi Doesn’t Care About Jewish Space Lasers. In Related News, You Can Buy Your Very Own Jewish Space Laser Activation Panel. No, Really!

Get yours while it still has that new Jew­ish Space Laser smell!

If you’ve nev­er heard about the Jew­ish Space Lasers con­tro­ver­sy, keep read­ing.

If, on the oth­er hand, you want to own your very own Jew­ish Space Laser Acti­va­tion Pan­el, you can buy one from Con­cord Aero­space for a measly $39.99.

It comes with two options: Gen­tile Space Laser, and the far more pow­er­ful Jew­ish Space Laser. Get yours while it still has that new Jew­ish Space Laser smell!

Speak­er of the House Nan­cy Pelosi shred­ded a res­o­lu­tion from a bunch of Demo­c­ra­t­ic Con­gress­crit­ters seek­ing to expel Con­gress­crit­ter Mar­jorie Tay­lor Greene (R‑GA). Seems they’re tired of her habit of insist­ing on roll call votes, which forces Con­gress­crit­ters to, you know, work for a liv­ing.

She also said some things about the Capi­tol riot they don’t like. Giv­en these two egre­gious, mor­tal sins, they just don’t feel safe around Rep. Greene.

Pelosi, sur­pris­ing­ly, was­n’t hav­ing it: She said there was con­text to be con­sid­ered with Greene’s post-riot remarks, point­ing out that lots of oth­er Con­gress­crit­ters in the House were freaked out by the riot and did­n’t have the best of all pos­si­ble sound­bites on the spur of the moment.

No word on whether she stood up and dra­mat­i­cal­ly tore their res­o­lu­tion in half the way she did Pres­i­dent Trump’s SOTU.

To be fair, Greene has offered up some adorably whacko nuggets of wis­dom, most notably her claim that Cal­i­for­nia wild­fires were caused by Jew­ish space lasers. It’s pos­si­ble Pelosi likes hav­ing her around for com­ic relief.

Still, it’s nice to see Pelosi not act­ing like a kinder­gart­ner for once.

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